Common Online Dating Scams – Beware!

This post was originally published on November 13, 2016
The latest update to this post was made 7 years ago.

Common Online Dating Scams – Beware!

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The hit list – compare your experience to these points, if you have matches, you may very well be dealing with a scammer:

1. They are in Ghana?  Hmmm, last time I checked, this was not a hotspot for hot girls and guys…  Just sayin’…
2. Noticing a sidestep or skating around a particular question you’ve asked?  Maybe you’ve asked more than once, but you just never get that answer?  This is a common tactic, they hope you’ll forget and get distracted with something else so they don’t have to answer.
3. Have you asked them to prove they are real?  Maybe even prove they are in the USA?  I have and boy, this one gets them every time.  They ask “how?” – which is valid, but when you give them ideas…  They play dumb or magically just stop responding…  Sure they may come back after a while and try to change the subject…  Stay on them and they’ll eventually give up!  Some of the tactics I’ve used that are effective:
   1. Have them grab a sheet of paper and write something unique on it.  I usually tell them to simply write something like “FNC 82897 and <my name>”…  Why?  Because it isn’t something they are going to be able to find quickly on the web.  They could Photoshop it, but it will take time and they will have to stall to do this!  This method puts them on the spot.  How long does it take a grab a sheet of paper, write your text on it and snap a pic?  Under a minute!
   2. So have them take a selfie without the note, then another one with the note.  Have them send BOTH pics over.  Do they match, are they wearing the same thing?  Now, beware here…  They may try and take a headless selfie with just body and your note.  No no!!  The shot must include upper body and head, that way you can verify the photo actually matches what you see on their original selfie and saw online.  Does it match the person you think you are talking with??
   3. Alternately, you could demand they send you a photo of their drivers license, state id or whatever.  But good luck with that.  The next valid option would be Skype, Tango or Facetime…  This way you can see the person in real-time, between these three software programs we are covering Windows phone, Android and Apple devices (Facetime being primarily Apple to Apple calling).  Use the others if you are cross platform (ie: one Android, one Apple for example).  Make sure they don’t just show you their surroundings…  You want to SEE THEM!  Don’t let them skate on this, because they will certainly try.
4. What if they claim they don’t have enough data for a video call or need to buy more ‘airtime’… Whatever!  Plan B, Have them go to a local cafe – there are plenty of them that have WIFI and guess what, even phones and computers in Ghana have cameras built in, so don’t buy any BS about they don’t have access to it and certainly don’t buy them airtime on their cell phone from Walmart, as they usually insist on..  That airtime, even if you do buy it for them is for you and every other guy they are working the scam on.
5. Have they asked for money yet?  It’s coming, so get ready!  There are many sad stories and reasons they need ‘funds’ to carry on talking.  Here are the ones I’ve encountered:
   1. I have a sick/dying family member who needs an operation or was harmed in an accident.
   2. They need money to take an exam at the local hospital or college so they can graduate.
   3. They need money for a plane, train or bus trip to come see you.  Some of the more bold moves are saying they will come live with you or even marry you if you’ll just get them out of where they are now…  RUN my friend, run!  This is NOT what you want!
   4. BEWARE – they usually want money via Walmart (I guess they have some delivery service now) or the old standby, Western Union.  Please folks, NEVER FALL VICTIM to this…  It’s one of the oldest tricks in the book for online scammers!
6. You’ve been talking for a little while (like less than a day) – but all of sudden, the dating site you met on is no good anymore – they find it inconvenient and want you to meet up with them on another platform.  They prefer Yahoo Messenger, WhatsApp and as of late, KIK Messenger.  This is so they can get away from the scam watchers on the reputable dating sites who will often delete their profiles.  When you branch away into KIK land, you are on your own and they know it!
7. Broken technology, this one was new recently…  I was told we couldn’t correspond via phone because the phone was recently dropped and damaged, now the speaker is broken, so only text is possible…  While there is a chance this actually occurred, I still call BS…  Cuz guess what, two days later, magically the phone was fixed – maybe they forgot the lie that I was told a few days before…  I mean it is hard remembering all the lies you are telling the many you are trying to scam!

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